Inter-Personal Conflict Is A Productivity Time Bomb!

Ever notice how a two- or three-minute conflict with another person can drain more energy from your system than a full day’s work? If you carry that emotional upset with you and then take it home day after day, you make it grow. Down goes your own productivity, and down goes the productivity of those to whom you complain.

Persistent, unresolved conflict is a time-waster of the worst kind. Have the courage to fix it fast. If necessary, seek help from another person. You will conserve both time and energy.

Saying NO is an instant time saver

Saying no is everyone’s prerogative. Here are four simple tips from author Jo Coudert that help you do it in a way that’s not harsh or unkind.

1. “I’m glad you asked, but my schedule won’t permit me to accept your offer.”
2. “Let me think about it.” (You seldom have to accept on the spot.)
3. Use humor. “I suppose you think I say no just because I’m mean! Well, it’s true!”
4. “Sorry, but that’s not something I do.” (That’s inarguable.)

Be ready. Say no when you mean it. In the long run, it’s much easier than saying yes.  This is productivity tip #30 in our book Attack Your Day! Before It Attacks You.

Interruptions, A Productivity Killer

On a typical day, you can expect to get caught in the crossfire of interruptions, the unexpected will bubble up, and demands will fall out of the sky at inconvenient times.  Flexicuting will be required.

Yes, we invented the word flexicuting because we can’t think of a better way to describe this skill.  Events are so fluid in today’s work environment that we have to change, adapt, and shift our focus all day long.

Flexicuting involves the ability to:

• Be as willing to leave your activity list when priorities shift as you are willing to stick with it.
• Be able to turn on a dime in the middle of the day when an opportunity presents itself.
• Develop the habit of reserving some time every day to deal with the expected/unexpected.
• Be wired 24/7 without letting it be a source of distractions and frustration.

Would you like to become better at flexicuting?  Here’s how! Recognize it’s a survival skill by changing your mindset and practice the forgoing flexicuting skills daily. It can be quite fun.

Flexicuting involves the skill of both multi-tasking activities and alternate-tasking activities. It also requires the wisdom to know when to use and when to avoid either of these approaches.

We’ll talk about multi-tasking first. In our society, the term multi-tasking is overused. Even worse, the skill has been elevated to the pinnacle of desirable abilities and we often find ourselves abused—and sometimes abusing—in the execution of multi-tasking because there are some guidelines to multi-tasking that most people aren’t aware of.

The best advice we can give people is to BEWARE OF MULTI-TASKING! Here’s why. When you are executing multiple activities at the same time, none of these activities has your complete focus. If you must multi-task, it should be done only when you combine simple, mindless tasks such as opening your mail and watching the news.

TIP: Never, never, never multi-task while carrying on a conversation with another person.

Multi-tasking, when abused, leads to time contamination. An example of time contamination would be taking your child out for pizza so you can have some quality one-on-one time together, and then taking a cell phone call for fifteen minutes while your child stares into space. Time contamination is also working on your laptop while supposedly watching your child’s soccer game.

Alternate-tasking is the natural result of being wired 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and 365 days a year (24/7/365). Living under these conditions, it makes sense to alternate our work and personal life activities in a way that we can fully experience both. While multi-tasking can contaminate time, alternate-tasking does not.

Alternate-tasking is being 100% where you are. Be 100% in the pizza shop with your child and then place the call after the pizza outing. Alternate-tasking permits us to fully engage all activities without dilution or contamination of the experience.

Alternate-tasking can help you get more done in less time than multi-tasking because, when you are fully engaged, you are more efficient and productive.

TIP: Alternate-tasking requires FOCUS. Begin with tasks that you can get done in 15 minutes or less until and free yourself from interruptions by shutting your door, closing out email, and don’t take calls etc.

Playing tag as a child was fun. Telephone tag is not!

For sure, playing telephone tag is a time-waster. So why play? Make a change by setting telephone appointments and honoring them. If you can’t take the time to talk with somebody who just called you, say so and set an appointment to call him or her back, rather than just say, “I’ll call you back.”

When responding in voicemail, don’t just leave a message—leave some best times to reach you. And above all, avoid irritating others by saying your number so fast it’s hard to understand, forcing them to waste time by replaying your message over and over to get your number.

These simple tips not only save time, they are good manners.

Time Sponges are Costly

A sponge soaks up water.  A time sponge soaks up time that could otherwise be applied more effectively. There are three kinds of time sponges.

1. Others that soak up our time
2. Habits that soak up our time
3. Problems that soak up out time

The first kind, others, is controlled with discipline. The second kind, habits, is controlled with awareness and discipline. The third kind, problems, is controlled with anticipation and preparation.

Discipline, awareness, anticipation and preparation are essential skills for today’s environment. Spot the sponges that are soaking up your time. Deal with that other person, that time-wasting habit, and anticipate problems in advance. You’ll probably discover you’ll have far more time than you think for the important things.

Stop letting people steal your time!

The most common activities that break our focus are interruptions and distractions by others. If we have a wimpy “no muscle” then we will be dominated by them. Dealing with them is easy. All you really need to know are the four response options and the three focus techniques for saying no.

The four response options to interruptions are easy to use. How do you decide which one to choose? Simply color your choices as we described in the first chapter. The four response options are:

1. Respond and do it now when it’s red, (required immediate action).

2. Reschedule for a later time when it’s green or yellow and can be postponed, (needs to be done today or tomorrow).

3. Refer it to someone else if it’s not in your domain.
4. Refuse to do it when it’s gray. This is when you use your “no muscle.”

The four techniques for refusing or saying no are:

1. The Immediate Response Method
This is when you refuse a request on the spot, immediately after it is made. There are four elements you can include in your refusal statement to soften the response. The elements express:

• A desire to be helpful
• A singular reason you can’t
• An expression of regret
• And a thank you for asking

Here’s an example of the refusal statement using those elements. “I’d love to help but right now I just have too much on my plate, I’m really sorry but thank you for asking.” This is a classy approach most people will feel good about.

Caution: When giving a singular reason for saying no such as your plate is full, don’t give details. The more specific reasons you give, the less persuasive you’ll sound. You are not obligated to give reasons.

2. The Delay Tactic
This is when you are unsure and you want to think through the request. People often say yes when they should say no because they are under the pressure of the moment. For example, use a simple statement such as, “I’d like to but I’m not sure I can. Give me some time to think about it and I’ll get back to you.” If, after thinking about it, you decide you can’t, then use a refusal statement with the elements described above.

3. The Helping Hand Approach
This technique is driven by a sincere desire to be helpful even though you must say no. For example, recommend to the person somebody else who might assist them, or you could suggest alternative solutions. You might also agree to commit some limited time to it. It’s good time management to always lend a helping hand when we can.

4. Just say NO
This takes courage. But when a person approaches you with “gray matter” just say NO. Remember, gray stands for activities that are a complete waste of time, such as office gossip. In our seminars we go through an exercise where participants stand up and yell in their loudest voice, “NO…NO, NO, NO. What part of no don’t you understand! Can’t you see that I am working here!”
Practice these techniques and your “no muscle” will get stronger and stronger.

Avoid the ricochet effect & stay on task

An open door policy is different from an open clock policy

An open door policy means you are accessible by appointment. An open clock policy means you are accessible regardless of the time of day. Time managers who grant access to themselves at any old time of day for any old issue not only don’t get their own work done, but they don’t grow people. Be accessible, yes, but not too accessible.

Guard your time and teach others to think for themselves.

Many time problems are self-imposed

Avoid the ricochet effect, stay on task

The ricochet effect is the human tendency to lose focus after an interruption. Interruptions break our continuity of thought. They can result in our failure to refocus on what we were doing prior to the distraction. This can minimize our effectiveness.

Making a prioritized list at the beginning of the day is a good way to correct this tendency, but only if we keep the list visible at all times. When the list is constantly in our view, it serves as a tool to re-anchor our attention after an interruption. Sailing through the day without something to remind us to keep on task is like trying to navigate without a rudder.